The Good the Bad and the Ugly

Posted February 8, 2008

What's it Worth... Life in New Jersey

It’s easy to get wrapped up in our hectic lives, but it’s not always so easy to take periodic reality checks. This unscientific, irreverent index is meant to spur debate and keep us all thinking.*

GOVERNMENT

MILLIONS TO WIN AN ELECTION When $65 million nets a U.S. Senate seat, and a like sum could catapult a candidate into the governor’s office, we’d have to vote.
When HALF that sum can’t get it done in either race, it’s time to go back to the drawing board.

PUBLIC SERVICE Everything you do, regardless of when or with whom, is fair game. The public has grave doubts, doesn’t vote, and is rarely pleased.

PROPERTY TAXES Um, have your out-of-state friends ever shown you their tax bills? RESOUNDING.

GAS TAX $4 a gallon stinks, but so do impassable roads. Something’s got to give.

CORRUPTION Indictments mount, jokes multiply, trust is destroyed.

ENVIRONMENT Are we one big ’burb or committed to preservation and diversity?

BEAR HUNT Nobody wants animals to die. Of course, we don’t want pets and children to either. 

SPORTS & RECREATION

DEVILS HOCKEY New lease on life, new lease on stadium. Will fans remember and return?

RUTGERS FOOTBALL With millions invested and ostrich-like support, good recruiting and wins over Buffalo and Villanova don’t wash.

JETS AND GIANTS If they’re staying, can they at least get rid of the NY on their helmets?

NJ HALL OF FAME It used to be just for homegrown athletes. Now it will embrace artists, entertainers, inventors, writers, and musicians.

STEROIDS Rumors of high school subculture are scary.

NJ ARTS No, we don’t have to cross the Hudson or Delaware rivers to be entertained.

CONCERT TICKETS $400 to see a 62-year-old man in spandex wheeze,“What a drag it is getting ooooolllld”?

THE SHORE Do we really need to answer this? 

LIFESTYLE

OPULENT CELEBRATIONS Bouncers at a Bar Mitzvah? Two hundred guests for a first birthday?

FACE-LIFT Worth it if you want to take the years off. (Bonus: You save on gym memberships.)

SUMMER CAMP Your kids will learn more about surviving in the adult world while playing “Capture the Flag” than anything they pick up in homeroom. EIGHT WEEKS OF

NAIL SALONS Buy a nail file. Buy some nail polish. Take the extra dough and go to lunch. Repeat.

CELL PHONES Sadly, a person without one is simply not complete.

$100 HAIRCUTS A good cut is priceless, a bad cut leads to tears and close friends saying, “It’s not that bad—really!” 

EDUCATION

ABBOTT SCHOOLS Stigma aside, 31 districts now provide a free pre-school education to needy 3- and 4-year-olds.

COUNTY COLLEGE The NJ Transfer program moves two-year grads to four-year state universities.

PRIVATE SCHOOL A private high school diploma is just worth more. Here’s hoping it leads to a college scholarship.

DOUGLASS COLLEGE This all-women’s institution is in danger of being covered by the Rutgers umbrella.

CHARTER SCHOOLS Let’s stop fighting. They’re another way to help kids.

TUTORS If your kid has questions about quadratic equations and you think they were a 1960s psychedelic band, the writing’s on the wall.

THE NEW SAT Even though Drew University is dumping the test as an admission criterion, we’re all for essay questions, not just picking “c.”

MONEY

TWO-INCOME FAMILY If you’re doing it to pay the bills,
If you haven’t seen the kids in weeks 

BIG-BOX STORES They strangle competing mom-and-pop shops and kill downtowns. But they do offer stuff we need at lower costs.

HUMMERS They weigh 8,500 pounds, get about 6 miles per gallon, and take up three parking spaces. This one’s a no-brainer.

EARLY RETIREMENT No one ever lay on his death bed and wished he’d spent more time at the office.

THE MEGA-COMMUTE Unfortunately, too many of us have no option.

REAL ESTATE

ASBURY PARK, CAMDEN, AND NEWARK These once proud cities have been down for far too long. Revitalization is vital.

THE MCMANSION To some, the only place to park a Hummer. To others, a $2 million power trip.

HOME-EQUITY LOANS
To fix a leaky roof?
To pay the McMansion mortgage?

DOWNTOWNS A welcome return to familiar faces, friendly shopkeepers, community hubs. 

*Agree? Disagree? Can’t believe what we missed? We await your letters and e-mails.

Article from November, 2005 Issue.